This is admittedly a borrowed title from Andy Matuschak’s Work with the garage door up. The idea behind it is simple: unexpected connections can happen from random things, and random things can lead to unexpected connections.
Generally, when we do most things in life, we think, “Why would anyone want to know that I’m interested in this very niche thing?” Or, “Why should I share random stuff online or on social media? Who even cares?”
I generally don’t post much on Instagram. I hadn’t posted for months, and then one day I decided to share a reel I saw. It featured Leonardo DiCaprio smashing a glass at someone, paired with the caption: “Me when someone says self-help books are better than fiction.” I shared it because I felt the same way.
Self-help is not better than fiction.
To my surprise, someone replied to the story, someone I didn’t know personally, even though they were already in my followers list. That one story led to me sharing a philosophy reel with her later, asking for her opinion, which in turn led to a long conversation. That moment of unexpected connection would’ve never happened if I hadn’t shared something small and silly.
There have been other such cases.
I’ve been a happy Apple Music user for a long time. But unlike Spotify, it lacks social features. Of course, Spotify has blends, shared playlists, “Jams,” and so on. But what caught my eye was Spotify’s feature to share what you’re listening to live. Spotify connects directly to Discord and Instagram. On Instagram, you have to manually share it each time before a listening session — so one day, I did just that before going to bed (I listen to music while sleeping).
When I woke up, again to my surprise, a few people had replied to the music I’d been playing. That small act, simply sharing what I was doing, created new moments of connection. I ended up switching to Spotify after that. The internet makes these things even better.
As Theo mentions in this video, he once unexpectedly connected with a guy doing Advent of Code — they ended up competing for the first position without even knowing each other beforehand. Another time, someone recommended him a Zen Browser extension for hiding the toolbar on Excalidraw. He also discovered Sahej, who had been sharing what he was building on Twitter, so when he messaged him asking for a job, he knew. These seemingly small moments formed a chain of connections.
“People who move more slowly through life tend to get fewer shots on goal and have longer feedback loops. Perhaps they work privately on creative projects that they don’t show to anybody for months or years, or they stay in a relatively contained peer group for a long time without mixing it up.”
— Cate Hall
“You can’t plan to meet the people who will change your life.”
— Steve Jobs
People love to talk about what they’re interested in and, by extension, they love to talk to people who are genuinely curious about the same things. So being genuinely curious is necessary.
Do what you like, but share it with the world. Someone might connect with it. Don’t try to plan it. Don’t chase clout. If you’re even one degree turned from your real self, the connection you make will also be one degree off. I know that from experience.
Try to find ways to do what you already love, while also finding ways to socialize around it. Loneliness is also on the rise and it has nothing to do with how many people are around you but rather if you feel seen enough. There’s a culture, especially online, that glorifies the solo grind. But you don’t have to buy into it. Give before you take. Think: “What can I add to this?”
Even something random can be the door someone walks through to find you.